My family

My family
2023

Friday, February 23, 2018

Waiting Game

In our house we are waiting. Waiting for answers. I will be honest. I am NOT good at waiting. If I am honest, I don't know many people who are. Waiting is hard. The unknown is uncomfortable and triggers fear and worry. Add that to the fact that the thing you are waiting for is a solution to something that is causing you or a loved one pain and waiting gets even harder for this mama.
So I find myself counting down. I am counting down until the next doctors appointment. I am counting down to when the next test result comes in. I find myself searching for the end of the tunnel and rushing to get through it.
What am I doing rushing things? Hoping time flies faster? But just yesterday I was saying I wanted a pause button or for life to slow down. Looking at FB memories I wondered "how did they grow up so fast?" Why am I trying to rush things away? Why spend so much time worrying and fearing tomorrow, next month, or next year and also hoping for them to get here?
I am SLOWLY learning that even the bad moments, the painful moments, the waiting moments are moments to make the most out of. Years ago, a woman came to talk to a mom's group I was in. The theme of her talk was "This too shall pass". She spoke of how as babies we can't wait for our child's NEXT phase. We can't wait until s/he sleeps through the night, talks, walks, is potty trained and so on. But we forget once they sleep though the night there will be no more late night snuggling and bonding. Walking means new exploration and less being held. We can rush to the next big milestone and take for granted the moment(s) right now. I try to remember her words and while I wait for what comes next (and I don't wait well - I know that) I don't want to take today for granted either.
Many people know Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 as a song sung by the Byrds. click here for video  Today, it is a season of waiting. I need to stop and focus on today and let tomorrow be it's own day and not rush it to get here. There are blessings to be found in every season. Sometimes we just have to look harder to find them. My goal today is to remember to look at today and not focus on whatever it is I am waiting for.



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