Friends

Recently, my husband and I were sitting with a group of people talking about the value of friends and how important having strong friendships was. Since then, I have been thinking. What defines a friend or a friendship? Were any of those people discussing the value of friendship my friends? Do I have the kind of friendship(s) we were talking about.
Like most people (I hope), I am married to my best friend. I also have 2 sisters who are more than sisters - they are friends. But outside of family, what defines a friend or a friendship and makes a friend different from an aquaintance? Is it what you do or don't do together? Is it what you share or have shared in the past? Is it common interests? Is it fulfilling a common need? Is it how often you see each other or talk? Does today's instant long distance communication (emails, cell phones social networks) change what friendship is?
Making friends has never been easy for me. I often walk away from meeting someone or even spending a day/evening with someone thinking to myself "I screwed that up. They don't like me". I am not sure why and it drives my husband (and family) crazy, but it's true. As a result, I can walk into a room full of people I have known for weeks, months or even years, and not know who is my friend.
But I do have friends. Some people I call friends are friends from my childhood. These friendships started back when friendship was defined by "She's my friend because she liked the picture I colored" or "because she talked to me at the picnic". They started out simple, innocent and trusting and they grew as we grew. Now decades later I can still chat with these friends on FB or in person as if not a day has gone by. but we don't see each other more than once or twice a decade sometimes. What about people who share a common interest or role? These are the other moms or dads who we chat with at school functions, kids activities, serving in the same program at church and so on. These relationships are not be as "deep" as others so are these friends or acquaintances? Then there are the relationships in between. Some are friends who you see regularly, we talk, share and have things in common who would probably be there if you needed them but we don't socialize. There are also "friends" who I socialize with but I know when the chips are down - they won't be around.
But which of these types of friendships and relationships is the type of friendship we were discussing that evening a while back? We were discussing friendships where you share common beliefs and values, common experiences, common interests, bring out the best in one another, help one another to grow. You are there for one another AND have fun together. The kind of friendships that take time and investment to grow and flourish. I think if I am honest I often find myself looking for these deep friendships instantly - without putting in the time to build them. However, now at 40 something, I also see the importance of have all kinds of friends - friends for a reason, friends for a season and friends for a lifetime.  I am blessed to have my friends. Friends who it's taken me decades to get to know and to let them get to know me and a few new friends who I am just starting to know. Thank you to all my friends <3

2013 - What's New
I usually wake up each morning grateful for a new day and a new beginning but recently I am even more thankful for every day I have. I try not to take the opportunity each new day is for granted. As I sit here recent events are fresh in my mind, but when I look back at this entry 10 years or perhaps even 10 days from now time will have blurred my memory. Shootings at a elementary school and at a neighborhood house fire are among the events that remind me not to take a moment for granted. But other events as well that don't make the news also remind me that each day is a gift not to be taken lightly. Little things like friends looking at colleges with their children or planning to send a child on a missions trip. Big things like a friend's waiting to hear from the Dr whether the lump is cancer or not. Everyday something reminds me how each moment is a gift.
This year I am trying to stay focused on the gifts and blessings of each day. I am going to try and make the most of the opportunities I have to take care of myself, my family and my community. I am going to focus on "the silver lining" of every storm cloud.
I started 2013 by signing up to be an "Iron Girl". This summer I will bike, run and swim in an Iron Girl Triathilon with perphaps 20 (plus or minus) other women I am blessed enough to call friend. I am grateful that I can even consider doing this after knee and back injuries. I am grateful that my family is not only encouraging me to do this but they are also going to be training along side of me. All of us getting healthier as a way of not taking anything for granted!
Our pastor at church recently preached on finishing the race strong. None of us knows when we will reach our finish line. We just need to be grateful we are still in the race and run each day like the finish is just around the corner. Sometimes it's painful. Our bodies ache and we are tired and we feel like we can't breathe. But we push forward. I truly believe that God is with us always. He's there handing us the water we need to go on and cheering us forward through the pain if we just accept him and his help.
So this day, this year and I pray for the remainder of my days I will finish strong and not take a minute of the "race" for granted.